An idiots guide to Australia;

* We do not hunt crocodiles or ride kangaroo’s. Curse you Steve Irwin for tarnishing our image.
* We are one of the most urbanised countries IN THE WORLD…above the United States. Just because theres only 22 million of us doesn’t mean we fucking live like Crocodile Dundee.
* Australia is not of a singular race or culture [although a racist minority would LOVE to beg to differ]. Australia is THE most multicultural country in the world.
* Australia does not have a national dish. Over my dead body will it EVER be a meat pie.
* We don’t live in the desert; why the fuck would we!? Over 80% of Australians live within 2 hours drive of coastline.
* Uluru [that big fucking red rock] is NOT within viewing distance of the Sydney Harbour Bridge; or the opera house. It is over 2793kms away [thats roughly 1736 miles.] So don’t believe the tourism posters or the tacky tourist artworks.
* I have never, EVER heard someone say “G’day” or “throw some snags and shrimps on the barbie”. Firstly, king prawns pwn over shrimps. Secondly, we aren’t retarded [except for Tasmania…we don’t know what the fuck happened there.]

/rant.


195 notes
tagged as: naive. tourists. mainly americans. no offence.

  1. spark- reblogged this from bitchiel
  2. walk-on-the-wild-side reblogged this from crassputin
  3. instagrust reblogged this from atearose
  4. igivemyselfthecreeps reblogged this from bonejangless
  5. caiteshey reblogged this from thericequeen
  6. naysen reblogged this from bitchiel
  7. and-so-they-tell-me reblogged this from roger-explosion
  8. collapsingonbridges reblogged this from oberonkingofthefaeries and added:
    And Adelaide, who the fuck decided to add that? Ahaha, oh god i hope none of my followers are from there.
  9. chivalryisdead reblogged this from thericequeen and added:
    the only time i hear people say that last one is to take the piss out of eachother. g’day mate ;)
  10. oberonkingofthefaeries reblogged this from womanofdarkdesireseb
  11. r0man-rel0aded reblogged this from womanofdarkdesireseb
  12. ohitsrebecca reblogged this from thericequeen and added:
    Can I also add that none of us own kangaroo’s or koala’s. It’s illigal. Oh, and koala’s are not bears. They’re...
  13. beautifullyblissful reblogged this from ranieldadcliffe
  14. featherpirate reblogged this from warmhands and added:
    I remember hearing a story about some tourists from USA planning on going to Uluru from Sydney as a day trip. I never...
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  16. teenage-crimee reblogged this from toast-princess


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